First quarter life is the most important phase to me, born, growing up experiencing many things, tortured, broke, happy, filled up with tears, laugh and joy. First quarter is the most childish age yet the happiest to happen and saying goodbye to it seems a little kicking me inside. Hard times happened several time, the upside down world of mine too. I am enough with being immature all the time. The new second quarter I hope will be the happier since gaining new age seems stressing for several people. But age is just a number to me, and welcoming this second quarter should be more goodness and fun in all aspects anyway.
Let’s say some people may feel like pain in the ass to me, but entering this new age it shouldn’t matter anymore. Having all the ups and downs the whole first quarter has giving me a hard yet strong personality now. I was badly injured from the accident of getting burnt, got bullied by my fellow elementary school “friends”, been in long time not having motivation to study but seeking more friends to cure the hurt and the demotivation of my life. I try to accept things more than before, but sometimes being in this way I still feel the grief. I want to play, study and be everywhere on the earth, feel the summer wind blowing on my hair and the skin get sunkissed color. Sadly I couldn’t do that much, that is why sometimes I still want to be open as before the accident. Wearing hijab is my only choice, luckily it’s also the religion that rules that so I am easily following it. For some, judging is easy why me still wanting to open and show my hair. Isn’t it irritating when seeing cool and cute clothes you wanna wear but couldnt because you bring all your scars with you? It sucks dude. I don’t care anymore If some people disagree with the way I think, I wanna do things, I dress up and everything that I believe it’s keeping me alive. But being in this way of dressing now is way safer since it’s keeping me from bad things to happen when I get covered like this.
Being in my mid 20’s more and more my friends stepping to their next life stage, marriage, getting babies or the next level on studies or carreer, staying stuck with my single status sometimes tiring of being asked, talked about, or criticized. I don’t mind them all again. Which girl who doesnt want marriage? I want that too. But rushing is the bad idea to do when I am not that ready. I still want to study, travel and improve myself before reaching my 30. And I am already sick of how local guys treat me, now in the mode of not needing any and settle too soon. Well, I’m better on my own than having the wrong company. How If I fail and everybody just watch me falling on my knees? What If I don’t want to be tied and I spend my time with the wrong man. Omg, that is too scary for me. I don’t wanna rush things and fail it so quick, better take it slow and enjoy the process I am having than rushing it. Cherishing everytime , everything I have while I’m still on my own is the best way to do. The chasing and the finding process is the most exciting people said. Couldn’t agree more, just wanna enjoy times I still have before welcoming thirty.
As I move on my life stage from kid, being teenager and now being an adult, many obstacles and fear of doing things I had before couldn’t kill my vibes anymore. Welcome to the new age cewek meriang, no more time wasted and keep looking forward for joyous years ahead. Let’s face another adventure, be at the happiest and well let’s keep improving and loving yourself girl ❤❤❤
Supposed to be posted on February 5th but me being sick and have my training that time